This past week has not been the best. I’ve been unmotivated to do much of anything but read.
My allergies have been really bad this past week but that’s not the reason.
I attended a memorial service for a dear lady last weekend, but that’s not the reason either.
I’ve been attending a pity party of sorts. I have a tendency to get crabby and then sit and pout and not do anything that I should be doing because it seems like no one in my house appreciates anything I do.
This always happens when I start thinking about myself….I get selfish, and start seeking thanks-you’s from my husband and kids, and then when I don’t get them I sulk and quit doing pretty much everything but cooking (I have to eat too).
I frustrate myself when I do this.
It’s selfish; but it’s also not fair to me to constantly be taken for granted. But then again, I shouldn’t be doing things I should be doing for thank-you’s; but then again, I’m not…I just want to be appreciated once in a while. Even the lowliest employee gets a paycheck. What do I get?
I do things that need to be done, because they need to be done. But, I want there to be a point to it. Without receiving any appreciation for what I do, I feel like I just exist in my house. There are days where I feel like I should just stop everything I do, because then maybe my family will notice just how much I do do. But recovering from the chaos that would abound if I went on strike would be no mean feat and I’m not quite willing to go there, so I keep on keeping on. But it’s hard to do it with any joy when I feel like no one cares.
Like I said to a friend about this, the only luxury I have is complaining about it.