Not so comfortably numb

From Inside the Borderline

I recently met a very nice man.  Very intelligent and easy to talk to.  Every time we’ve been together we’ve been able to talk a lot together.  Not something I’m used to…

He got me to talk about something I’d never been able to verbalize before.


Or, rather, my lack thereof.

Emotions I have.  Like most borderlines, I’m extremely emotional.  They come on fast and often overwhelm me.

But then there’s feeling.  On occasion I feel frustrated, but mostly bored.  Sometimes, I feel a flush of affection for my children and, more frequently, a flush of sheer terror at the thought of them being taken away from me.  But the majority of the time, I don’t feel anything.  That’s the thing that frightens me.

I think that’s the main reason I can’t keep a relationship.  I can spend time with a man and enjoy his company, but I feel nothing…

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About Sharon

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